1. JAM convinced me to let him ride the school bus for the first time. I was completely against it not only because of what happened in kindergarten, but also because that meant releasing the reigns a little bit and trust a stranger of a bus driver to take care of my most prized possession. Long story short, it ended up becoming convenient for me to not have to drive him to school every morning and JAM had fun sitting with his BFF on the bus. The yellow school bus is something kids looked forward to when starting school!
2. A lot can happen in a short 10 minute bus ride to school. JAM got bullied twice on the bus and all I could see was RED once I found out. (2a) FYI even though schools promote all this anti-bullying stuff sometimes that isn't enough. YOU are your child's voice. If mama bear didn't raise hell in the school to get the situation resolved, my kid would have ended up being another invisible bullying statistic. SPEAK UP and FIGHT for your child's safety. It doesn't mater the area you live in or how fancy the school...kids can be cruel anywhere.
3. Sometimes I have to remind myself that certain life experiences are a first for JAM. He's never had to deal with unfriendly kids really so I have to be patient and teach him the difference between a friend who's joking around and an unfriendly child who is taking advantage of him. With that said, sometimes I have to just step back and I guess you can say, let him get hurt so he learns. As long as he's not getting hurt physically of course. This also gives me an opportunity to teach him other life lessons like everyone isn't always your friend and that's ok. It happens and it's definitely not your fault. Here's how you handle it.....etc. etc.
4. No matter how much communication you try to achieve between you and the school and/or teacher, sometimes the best route is always in-person communication. Many things didn't seem to get executed until I was physically present to make sure it got done. It's a pain, but sometimes it's necessary.
5. Volunteering is still a great thing to do for your child. Not only do they love it, you become a familiar face around the school and there are definitely benefits to that.
JAM and I are ready for his Fall Festival! |
6. This year JAM had a lot on his plate from school to religion classes to soccer practice to just trying to be a kid....sometimes mom has to make executive decisions to make sure certain things stay #1 on the list.
7. JAM has always been a bright student but first grade was a little different for him. Parents are a child's number one teacher. They can only learn so much at school so most of it MUST be reinforced at home. His teacher gave him a lot of independence in the classroom as far as when to complete certain assignments and he tended to slack off a bit. Creating a visual like a white board or a chart at home helped him see what he needed to get done at school and the benefits of completing it. Learning responsibility and independence was a big thing this year. People at school aren't hovering over their shoulders as much as they were in Kindergarten so it's important to check-in with them every so often to make sure things are still getting done.
8. JAM picked up a lot of not-so-great behavior from his peers at school. There was a lot of reminder this year of what the morals and values of OUR family were and why we choose to live by them. Again, these are first time life experiences for him, but it still needs to be nipped in the butt right away.
and just like that...from August to June.....we were all done. |
What is a piece of advice you'd offer to fellow parents who have school-aged children?
What a smart and brave little guy you have there!! I applaud you - I'm utterly grateful not to face the school bus and bullies fears for a few more years - not ready yet to relinquish that control!
ReplyDeleteThanks Megan! Yes parenting in general is already a crazy ride and life throws in school just for fun hehe. It's an interesting learning experience.
DeleteTrust your instincts
ReplyDeleteYes Sara! Sometimes that's the best thing to do when you have no clue what else to do.
Deletestill make time for them to be a KID. it can get overwhelming between school, homework..sports..etc.
ReplyDeleteIt really is so easy to get consumed with the extracurricular stuff Deb! I def. had to make an executive decision and pull him out of a season of soccer after seeing how exhausted he'd be every week running from activity to school, etc.
DeleteI miss Chicago so much!! These are great tips. I plan on being very active in my children's schooling via volunteering and everything. I too would worry about bullying on the school bus. I hope that I have instilled the ability to talk to me about those things when the time comes for my son to take the bus!
ReplyDeleteYou're a Chicagoan too Emily? Cool! Bullying was def. a top concern on my list mainly bc I was bullied at that age. Luckily my son is real open with me...hopefully it continues as he gets older, but if you read my post about his bullying experience it definitely was a sensitive subject. After the first time he was a little sensitive to tell me the second time bc he didn't want me to cause a ruckus so I had to handle it a little more level headed instead of like king kong. Sometimes parents forget that the kids still have to go to school at the end of the day and face all these people...including the staff.
DeleteI never rode the bus to school, we were only blocks away so we were "walkers".
ReplyDeleteI never considered that young kids might not know that some people are unfriendly or even cruel, but that's definitely something to think about. Some kids can be bullied or taken advantage of so easily. I'm sorry your little guy was bullied, but good for you for letting your Mama Bear out!
I have a few of those Presidential awards from Bush 1. I think I may have some from Reagan too!
My daughter just finished her first year of preschool and it's hard for me to imagine that a little over a year for now, she'll be ready for Kindergarten!
The years definitely fly by Jenn. My son had an amazing preschool and after a couple initial bumps kindergarten was pretty awesome too. I never really rode the bus either til about jr. high cuz my mom used to drive my lil sister and I. There's a lot of things that JAM reacts to that I forget that it's a first time life experience so he has no clue how to handle the situation while i'm looking at him like "DO SOMETHING!" lol. As kids they easily make friends but school age is where the dividing and grouping happens so I had to make him a little more aware so he's not taken advantage of.
DeleteDon't load them up with things you want them to do. Let them choose their own activities and if they seem overwhelmed, be OK with letting the extras go if needed. Spend time doing things as a whole family instead of everyone always going in different directions.
ReplyDeleteThat was definitely something we worked on this year Kristin. With Mahal working full-time and me going to college full-time we easily get wrapped up in life's chaos. We also learned to be a little more lenient with JAM with our expectations. We had to remind ourselves that he's naturally a driven and bright kid so sometimes it's ok to let him lead the way :)
DeleteYou are their advocate. Don't expect the school to have their best interest at heart. Don't be afraid to speak up and rock the hell out of the boat if you don't like what is happening.
ReplyDeleteYes Kimberly! and I learned, the sooner the better. Don't wait issues out bc they'll use that as an excuse to blow it off. Like I said, they have a billion anti-bullying campaigns and when I addressed the issue it's like they could care less until I wanted to talk to higher ranks and ooh that pressed a button and got the job done ;)
DeleteSending my kids off to 1st grade is always harder on me than kindergarten. Unfortunately for my two oldest boys, it was the bus driver who was the big bully. Luckily he is no longer their driver but I had to let mama bear out a few times as well. It is hard for me to let go and let my boys venture out on their own but it's amazing to see the growth in each of them at the end of each school year.
ReplyDeleteI have some cray stories from my childhood about bus drivers. I even had one that cursed at us! As a mama of boys I could imagine all the "badges" you've earned over the years. I'm sure you understand my concern. Please tell me 2nd grade will be a little brighter? hehe
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