This will be a short post today or else I'll keep talking forever and ever hehe. Although we only have a son, Mahal and I always go back and forth on certain situations when it comes to our imaginary daughter. Yes, yes, people laugh at us because we have tiffs about a kid that is nonexistent haha. Mahal and I like to discuss future scenarios that our kids may come across and how we would handle it so we remain on the same page if it ever comes up. However, we tend to bump heads when it comes to "our little girl". He always talks about high-fiving JAM when it comes to girls in school while mentioning prison bars if it was our daughter. Long story short, he likes to mention how he's excited for JAM to have all these opportunities as he gets older, and sometimes I don't agree on his parenting methods. I always tell him if the rolls were switched and we had a daughter that he'd be upset if I handled it the same way. He agrees. Of course the main topic is usually about dating and going out. He thinks it's funny to teach JAM how to woo the girls at school while when he comes home talking about a girl I'm like "Who is this girl?!". In return, I always say that I can't wait to have a daughter so he knows how it feels and he gets mad hehe.
What do you guys think? I agree that sometimes you can't always compare the two genders, but I feel that to some degree there should be an even playing field when in comes to my kids regardless of gender. If JAM is a 17 year old teen and wants to go out with his friends until 10pm then I think our daughter should be allowed to do the same. It's only fair right? She shouldn't get punished just because she's a girl. I guess I'll never know for sure until I have a daughter of my own, but for now I don't like the idea of sheltering my child just because she's a girl.
If you have both a boy and a girl, how do you handle this double standard? Even if you don't have both, what are your thoughts on it all?
Yes things have to be equal or we will be teaching our kids that it's okay for boys to do whatever and be dogs because they won't bring home the baby anyway. Even though we don't intentionally mean it this way and never say or think about it this way, it will come to pass if we don't teach our children to habits and respect now. A boy or a girl who wants to stay out late are both basically up to the same thing. While we were staying out late and having too much, sometimes inappropriate fun, it wasn't just boys or just girls. We were all up to the same thing, just with each other
ReplyDeleteI have both about 4 yrs apart. Its difficult to treat them just the same, but I try to always remind both to be strong and independent and to think for themselves... They can both do the same thing just as well as anyone.... Being a girl or a boy is not an excuse!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is more rough and tumble than my son. She beat 5 boys up who jumped her in kindergarten. They are only a few months apart in age (8 and 9) He is older. I have raised her to believe that girls can do anything boys can and she lives by that. I don't treat them any differently. No double standards in my house. They are equals. (They equally work my last nerve!!)
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